100-Proof Turkey For Thanksgiving?

November 24, 2009 by  
Filed under Weird Stuff

O’Casey’s bar in Manhattan is serving a 100-proof turkey for Thanksgiving.


Let’s face it, turkeys are bland and unappetizing. A typical Thanksgiving turkey meal has 101 sides because the main dish is so lackluster. If a turkey tasted good, you wouldn’t have to stuff it to the gills with stuffing.
A 100-proof turkey is an excellent idea, it helps you forget that the turkey doesn’t have much of a taste.
If I lived in Manhattan I would say “to hell with Thanksgiving with the family”, and I would drop by O’Casey’s

unveiling the nation’s first 100-proof turkey on Monday.

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The Thanksgiving Day Mystery-Enigma Rears its Gobbler Jowls!

November 23, 2009 by  
Filed under Music

thanksgiving-feastIt`s that time when we have to decide when and where the first, legitimate Thanksgiving took place. The firmest tradition is that it was at Plymouth Rock, Mass. in 1621. This is how I heard the spin-of-a-tale when I was a pipsqeak in grade school. This morning I heard claims that it was two years earlier in Jamestown, Virginia. The word thanksgiving springs up in a prayer by some unknown pastor from that troubled settlement.

Okay, so maybe there were two first events? But wait, now a third earlier communal feastal gathering has been cited. Clarification please? Robyn Gioia, a school teacher in St. Augustine, Fl, has published a children`s book, America`s REAL First Thanksgiving. This would put the date back to September 8th, 1565, when a Spanish explorer co-opted a dinner *(bean soup is only dish I`ve heard of, so far) with Timucua Indians.

These three events need to be further scrutinized for their authenticity or legitimacy. In the mean time, I will stick turkeywith the traditional telling of the story, with chummy cut-out Pilgrims and Indians imbibing in a mammoth feast with turkey, dressing (stuffing, if ya prefer) , cranberries, green bean casserole, yams, mashed potatoes, gallons of giblet gravy, ham, dinner rolls, cheeses of all kinds, pumpkin pie, pecan pie & apple turnovers. (Oops! Left out the relish tray with olives, pickles, celery & carrot sticks in dip…you know the drill.) Feel free to pile on more grub to the list, please!

For music, the keenest old timey tune for me  is Over the River and Through the Woods. I use to shine on this one in my elementary choir. And check out this top ten ‘thank you’ list from the oldie pop-song vaults. I Thank You by Sam and Dave looks the most interesting. At the family dinner table itself, I would recommend some J.S. Bach or some Verdi. Those intricate Bach loops will stimulate your appetite. If you have Switched On Bach, with Moog Synthesizer, this would be even better.

After you leave your parents house, I would recommend pulling out that new Them Crooked Vultures. Been spinning that one constantly since last week. Now, let us return to the historical controversy. What event is the REAL first Thanksgiving Day? Plymouth, Jamestown, or St. Augustine? Only one can be the Real Turkey Day